Iced Salad or My Mind Crumbles

I have a small story for you, to let you know how I am doing:

On Saturday, my dad bought some salad for me. Rocket, which we only get here in those pre-washed plastic bags. I love rocket. I can only hope I write about the right salad. ;)
Anyway. I had half of the bag for lunch on Saturday. Then I put the bag away.
Today when I came home from uni, I knew my mum would bring some fish from town later on, so I wanted some small snack-like thing to eat. So I open the fridge and look for my salad. It isn't there. "Strange," I think to myself. "Who in this family could have eaten it? I can't think of anyone...and they only came back from their trip yesterday evening, too. How mysterious!"
I eat nothing but have a cup of tea and wait for my mum with the seafood goodies.
15 minutes ago she called me into the kitchen and asked me why the heck I had put my salad into the freezer.
You know, I'm asking myself that as well.

Check my progress!

Ok, I know it looks kinda ugly right now, but I promise, once the whole thing starts the one bar is gonna go and all that will be left will be the progress bar.
Yep, next Wednesday Nano starts, and as you can see, my blog is trying to shape up for it! Once the little ship reaches the end of its bar, madness will begin, and I will start counting my nervous breakdowns as well as my words written! ;) And so can you! (the words written at least, I'll keep the breakdowns to myself.) Throughout the whole of November, whenever you look at my blog, you'll see how I'm doing...and if you want, you can cheer me on, too. ;)
The way things are looking time-wise, I'll need all the motivation I can get - or live without sleep for a few weeks...we'll see. :D

Ugh

I had two hours of sleep last night as for some reason I didn't manage to fall asleep before 6am. My legs feel like lead. :(
I have uni courses from 10.15 to 16.30, and a meeting with someone I'm doing a presentation with. I'm not sure I'm going to make a lot of sense today...
My mum says its my fault for falling asleep for an hour yesterday in the later afternoon. I blame the pot of (green) tea I had late in the evening - even if it would completely suck if I should already be this sensitive to any form of caffeine or theine. (Because, should I ever succumb to the lure of coffee again, will that make me go through the roof or what?)
I feel like sleeping for the rest of the day, but of course that won't happen.
Guess I'll have to make the best of it and try to look as awake and super-smart as possible...which might just be a little hard to do, since I feel like going "Graaah!" at everyone who talks to me. :P

Update: Ok, so I had courses until 17.45 (usually would be 17.30), I was probably feeling hopeful when I put it down as 16.30. ;) And it was pouring when uni was over. And I came home at 19.15. Ugh again.
Now, you might say: "Hey, you probably fell straight into bed! Go you!" but I didn't. Instead I felt this pressing need to dig out one of them old tapes I recorded when I was 12/13 and listen to "Do you remember the first time" by Pulp over and over again -while singing along and dancing around in my room. :D If that's not sleep-deprived and slightly demented behaviour, I don't know. ;) Ok, so singing and dancing around is GOOD, obviously, but doing it for over an hour, with the same song on for most of the time, and LOUD, while completely wreckedly tired - that's the demented part. Anyway, it felt great. So, as you can see, I had a wonderful end to a hectic day. :)

How the Wii works

Ok, so most of the people currently reading this blog will have no idea what I'm talking about...but hey, soon you will!

Now, what for most of my time at uni* has been something of a second life/career has been my videoplaying self. Blame it on the boyfriend, I got quite addicted. Ok, I should maybe explain: I played videogames before...Super Mario, Tetris. But he got me into RPGs.

I'm not going to talk about my Playstation career now, because that would take way too long, and I should be studying. ;) But just to let you know, I do follow the news to some degree, and this winter/spring, there's two new consoles coming out, the Nintendo Wii, and the Playstation 3.
Now, the Wii has this really funky controller, which will introduce all new gameplay options and whatnot, and yeah, if I ever get rich (and don't die tryin') I'll have to get that one as well.

Anyway, what I found today was this amusing video making some fun of the controller (and Link, everyone's favourite green clad kiddie hero).

Watch Link getting bashed

And now I should go back to reading the one part of the Canterbury Tales still left for tomorrow's lecture. Dumdedum. :)

*Until about one year ago, I should add. I'm way too busy right now...sadly.

Write your heart out 2006

...or NaNoWrimo 06, as it's usually called. ;)

As you can see, I have some time on my hands today for writing my long outstanding posts here - I stayed home from today's sports classes because of sore throat and headache, which I really don't want to develop into a proper cold. So I'm sitting here in my cuddliest warmest winter jumper, with scarf round my neck and a big pot of tea in front of me, doing my best to use the time well and do some reading for uni and writing for myself. :)

And this whole post is basically about writing for myself.

NaNoWriMo is a fantastic thing and I'm glad it exists. It entered my world in 2004 when a friend of mine posted about it in one of the forums I use.

Before I go on - what is this all about?
Well, it's about writing, quite simply, and about writing a lot in a short time. The thing is called "National Novel Writing Month", and even though it has been very international for a long time, the name as it is just works so nicely, they've kept it.
The goal for all those brave ones who sign up is to write 50,000 words of prose (fiction) in the month of November (ie 30 days). You have to start your story fresh from the start, so no continuing old stories. The purpose is to let yourself write without inhibitions. Don't worry about being perfect - just worry about reaching the right word count...that's enough worry for one month! I think Chris Baty (the crazy SF guy who invented the whole thing) says about it something like "writing with abandon" or something. As in, leave behind your inner editor and just write until your fingers hurt and your keyboard breaks down.

If anyone is still asking "Why would I want to do such a crazy thing?" here is my personal answer (you can find some answers on the Nano page as well):
Because it's fun. Because you will most probably surprise yourself. Because it has this great philosophy of not putting off good things forever but to throw yourself into what you love doing (ie writing for most of those who join in). Because the joy that finishing your novel brings will propel you along through all the winter dreariness and will boost your self-esteem through the roof. Because if you don't write this great story, noone will. Because imagination and creativity are such essential parts of our lives and usually live a sad underdog existence in our daily routines. Because you will meet people who share your passion. Because you will be inspired and inspire others. Did I mention it's excellent fun?

Now, let's continue with my own story:
In 2004 I had this great idea. I even knew how it was going to end. But I was missing an essential thing: A computer. I tried writing things by hand and then typing them when I had the chance, but duh - I failed miserably at around 12k. I still want to write that story someday, no matter how crazy it really is. (And it is, believe me.)

In 2005 I was in London. That alone was a very good and inspiring thing. Also, I had this library at hand with a pc lab that was accessible 24 hours a day. Yay for me! And so I wrote and wrote, with only three courses to do and no boyfriend or family demanding time away from the pc, and I finished my wonderful (crazy) 50k a few days before the deadline. I still have to write the ending though - and I will, soon.

This year of 2006 will be crazy (just like my stories, but not as nice I'm afraid). I'm doing lots of uni courses. I'm doing all the sporty stuff. I should be reading a whopping lot, and I think my professor would just be delighted if I did some work for my thesis. Also, I'm building myself some sort of social life now, very unusual as I didn't have such a lot of that for the past few years.
And - I will write this great and crazy story. Plus I will finish the story from last year. I will go mental around Nov 20 and have some nervous breakdown or scream at everyone who even so much as looks at me, but hey! ;)
On the computer front, all is well - I have my own notebook now, I have good access to the family pc...nothing to worry about anymore, thankfully!

I'm still trying to convince my surroundings to join in. My sister might be thinking about it, but as she has a lot to do as well and she's not as crazy as I am, she probably won't join...I'm working on convincing my best friend with the argument that she writes some stuff for her role-play character anyway...Tuesday evening she started musing about maybe writing one of the adventures down and that it would easily be enough material...so I'm still hopeful on that front.
Funnily enough, Meshell joined without knowing I did, so now we can kick each others behinds when we get, well, behind, which is great! ;)
I'm still thinking about putting up posters at uni etc. After all, I mentioned Nano in one of the articles I wrote for the spring edition of our departments magazine...noone sent me an email about that, but hey, maybe I just need to remind people a bit. Maybe I can bribe/convince the lecturer who does the Creative Writing course (which I did once, and we only have the one, and I don't have time for it now :P) to do some promotion in the course, that might help as well.
Anyone have any other ideas?

So, if anyone reading this has a glimmer of interest, but isn't too sure, let me know and I'll convince you. ;)

And if anyone wants to read what I produced in 2004 and 2005, hey, sure! Just don't expect a literary masterwork...rather, prepare for some crazy fantasy stuff with linguistic elements, and in the case of my later story, a good insight into what value shopping might have! ;D

Pretty little things

This is the earring post which I meant to write about two weeks ago...

The story goes like this: At around 14, I muse aloud about maybe having my ears pierced. My best friend promptly gives me some earrings as a present. After that, of course I had to have it done - even if I had changed my mind (I probably did still have some doubts back then). So, shortly after, when in town with my mum, she says "Hey, why not do it right now, right away?" And woopeduh, we're in the shop and I'm having holes shot into my ears. Ouch.
Even worse - I meet with my boyfriend in the evening and he's all like "Oh nooo, why the ears, oh my God, why did you do this?" etc. I feel like a complete idiot.
Result: For ten years I had my ears pierced, and for ten years I haven't really worn any earrings. Case closed.

And then, now, boyfriend gone (in German there is this nice expression for it which I'm not sure I can properly bring into English, so I'll leave it, but for the one German reader that already told me she's here (YAY) => "gegangen werden", ok? :D), I decide to indulge in a complete earring buying spree, and to wear them almost demonstratively...like a sign that the past is now truly over and done with.
Edit: Ok, I think the best translation I came up with is "he has been gone". Passive voice. Does that make sense?

So here are the results of my indulgence - all of them bought on Etsy.

Kathryn Riechert
These were the first ones I bought, and they're incredible! Kathryn wrote in her description that these are perfect for every day, and she's right! I could really wear these every day - if I hadn't bought such a lot of other ones! ;)
These are sterling silver, with little white pearls dangling beneath the discs. The detail on the discs was hand-hammered into them, and they really do reflect the light amazingly. I'm totally in love with them. :D


Patricia's Art
Of course I couldn't resist these! I mean, pearls! :D
I love these as they are pretty and not too extravagant while still being quite unusual. I think they're a little like me - not very loud but very interesting, ha! *makes herself look good*
At first I was worried that these would be too long for my comfort, but after wearing them for an evening I didn't even want to take them off anymore!
So, these are ceramic pearls with nice chinese designs on them (might be some I Ging stuff, but I'm not sure) and the slightly rosy pearls. Mhhh.

To stay a bit on the safe side I also bought the following two:

Funnily enough, I haven't worn these yet! No, I always went for the big and colourful ones instead of these safe and classic little pretties. Who would have thought?
Anyway, these are tiny, and both again with pearls (a word which I continually keep typing up as perals today :P).







Just a Tish
What can I say? Tish makes fantastic things! She selects the stones she uses by their character, ie their energies - if you believe in that kind of stuff. I do to some degree (*outs herself*).
She gives nice descriptions of what the stones she uses should help with.


These earrings, called Alice, use citrine and moonstone. This means they are good for intuition and for dispelling fear. Moonstone is a very feminine stone, too. :)
(If you're interested, you can look at her Items Sold list and check for details of what the stones can do.)


These are called Wink. ;)
Made of rutilated quartz and black/blue glass crystals.
Now, this quartz, if it fulfills everything it promises, then it should:
Get energy moving (good for me as I'm a lazy slob), assist with mental focus (which I sadly lack very often), and attracting love (a-HA!). Now, currently I mainly hope for some energy. Who knows, at some stage I might also hope for some love again. ;)

Now these are real fun. Called Catnip because Tish's cat was so fascinated with them! :D
I admit I haven't worn these yet as they're probably the most unusual ones I bought. Why should I wear them? Well, because they're fun of course, and because they might just help my memory and also with removing sorrow, both of which would be exceedingly good things. :)
(Stone is called carnelian, if anyone's interested.)


Danglebeads
Ok, so this is where I went a little crazy. Meshell had posted the ones she ordered on her blog, and I just fell in love. So of course I had to order my own, and try not to order the exact same ones that Meshell bought. Thankfully, that was quite an easy thing to do, as the selection is huge. Except for the red ones, I managed! :)

Of course I couldn't resist these as the colour was called "seamist green" and I'm an inland girl who is an ocean freak. :D
What is really fantastic about these is that when I had them I found out that one of the shirts I bought at some stage fits perfectly with a jumper I bought on a different date and the earrings match up perfectly with the colour of both of these! What a great coincidence! I might just be perfect at buying matching outfits when I don't bother about it! ;)

These are just nice and fresh and blue. Go perfect with another jumper of mine. What luck! :D







These are the red ones that I couldn't resist. Once I fit into my jeans again I will wear jeans, black jumper and these pretties....mhhh. :)






And I had to get hematite ones! Duh. But I bought different ones than Meshell did, so I'm ok, right?
Anyway, I haven't worn these yet because the only times I tried I was wearing a lot of black already, and it just looked too dark and dreary. I'm sure though that the perfect occasion for these will soon come my way.



These would be perfect for spring! Pity it's now October and cold. but I'm still wearing them! At least they remind me of spring. :)







And finally these. this is my absolutely most loved colour. I guess you could call it teal, or petrol, or bluegreen. I just love it, it's perfect! And so are these. On Tuesday I could get no useful outfit together, so I was wearing black and dark grey (ugh) and felt like an idiot for trying to put useful clothes together at 2.30am. So I put on these earrings and a scarf somewhat the same colour and felt a little better about it all.
But still, no more choosing clothes for the next day at that sort of time - I have no creativity and useful thoughts whatsoever at that stage I guess.

So, these are all the many great earrings I bought! I think it's 13 pairs or so. Wow.
But they've really paid off, I feel better when wearing some, not so boring etc, also like I at least did some little work on the way I look, which does wonders for my poor self-esteem.
Lastly, they are also great when I feel a little fidgety during class - I can just pull one of these from my ear and play around with them a bit. ;)

And that concludes this very very long review. Please check out all the pages/shops of the people I bought from, they make wonderful stuff!

I dream of smoking

I'm not a smoker. I never smoked. I never will smoke.
However - in my dreams I do.

I just remembered a minute ago that this night again I was dreaming about me smoking. I'm not kidding you. In my dreams, I'm actually a quite accomplished smoker.
Now, I had a lot of practice (in my dreams), because I dream these things repeatedly. Not the same dream over and over, but different ones, connected by the fact that my Dream Me is chain-smoking. Sure, I do not smoke in every dream I remember, but in a disconcerting number of them.

I can guess at what Freud and all psychologists might have to say about that. I probably had some traumatic experience in my oral phase and now, since I surpress that fact in my real life (I suppose?) my Dream Me/subconscious is free to smoke however much it wants to.
At least that's my guess - if anyone here has any other ideas, let me know.
(Fact: No one in my family smokes. My friends don't smoke. Only a few people I know smoke, and they're mostly colleagues from uni who I don't have much to do with.)

There are probably many possible reasons for this. But is there a solution? Are there any methods available for weaning my Dream Me away from the bad stuff?

Because it really messes with your life when you wake up and can't remember for quite a few minutes if you have ever smoked or not.

Duhhhhh bi duhhhh

Ok, so my brain for writing is taking a break...I have loads of unanswered emails and loads of things I want to write but don't want to write *right now*. :P
Problem: November isn't far away, and if anyone here knows me, they know what I'll be doing in November - writing my Nano stuff. (If you don't know me, and don't know what the heck I am talking about, I will write about Nano soon).
So, I have to get my writing enthusiasm into gear, and be quick about it.

But! Even though I haven't posted, and now owe three swap reviews, some (5?) sweet reviews, one earring review (hello to Perth!) and all sorts of other stuff - at least I managed to get and send in pictures for three of my swaps. Pretty good ones too (I think). So that's something done at least.
I'll get the ones for the other two swaps taken soon, and then I should probably work on new swaps - sorry to those people who are waiting for me to reply!

In other news, uni has started and it is hectic but fun. I have NO idea how I am planning to get all the work done, plus work on my reading list, plus work on my thesis, plus eat and sleep - but I'll work it out somehow. And if that means not reading everything for some course, well then, sorry course! I have to sleep sometime. ;)
(Oh yeah, add the Nano stuff to November. That is going to be soooo crazy this year...)

Maybe some bits about the sport classes I keep going on about. I am doing four very interesting and different things: Aikido (with my sister), sports massage (very neat), sports climbing (with my sister), and Qi Gong (or Ch'i Gong as I probably should write it - explained to us today). That's a lot, and even more so for little me who has avoided all serious sport for the last 6 years (yeah, back then, I was dancing - that's AGES ago, wow), except for going for walks and some very light jogging, and the bit of cycling that I do to get from A to B and back again.
Anyway, 4 courses. Of course, massage sounds easy, but when you do the massaging, you're actually quite active - so not just pure relaxation, haha. Qigong is probably the most relaxing of all the four things.
And they're all fun! Amazing but true! Yes, even the climbing stuff, which is hard, and kills my feet and hands, and is frustrating because we have a difficult wall with slippery holds and I'm a complete newbie. It's still fun! :)
It was probably insane to sign up for that much stuff in a semester where I already have to do much stuff, but what's the saying like? All is allowed in love and war, or something like that.

Just so you all know I am enjoying myself and have not forgotten about swaps finished, still outstanding, and all the other stuff!

Tired now (and for the last 8 hours or so :P), so off to bed it is.

Wardrobe Refashion Pledge

The Wardrobe Refashion Pledge

I, Barbara,

Pledge that I shall abstain from the purchase of "new" manufactured items of clothing.

I Pledge that I shall refashion, renovate, recycle pre-loved items for myself.

I Pledge that I shall create and craft items of clothing for myself with my own hands in fabric, yarn or other medium.

I Pledge that I will share the love and post a photo of my refashioned, renovoated, recylcled, crafted or created item of clothing on the Wardrobe Refashion blog, so that others may share the joy that thy thriftyness brings!

And I will do so at least until the end of 2006! Take that, H+M!

Rest and Resolutions

In the danger of sounding paradoxical - soon uni will start again (tomorrow, sort of), and soon I will find some rest and peace again. Haha.
Honestly, paper writing always gets me on edge. In the danger of sounding paradoxical again, my thesis should be so much more fun than those endless term papers! By now they annoy the hell out of me, no matter how interested I might be in the topic and how much I'd love to write about these things.

Anyway, October 1 which just passed here marked the beginning of my new resolutions for the rest of the year, which will hopefully make up for not having any sort of resolutions this past New Years.

They are mainly concerned with spending less - far less. Close to nothing would be preferable, though that will probably not happen.

To achieve this, I have resolved the following (I might miss a few things now, I have a longer list elsewhere):
1. To not buy any more clothes. To help with this, I joined Wardrobe Refashion 06. I think I need the group pressure, uh, group support here.
2. To not buy any more magazines, books etc. I have some exception clauses here:
a) If I absolutely need a book for uni reading and it's gone both from my department's library and the main library, I may consider buying it.
b) If I finish any exams during this term, and my grade is either an A, B or C, I may buy myself one single magazine as a reward.
To further my goals in this respect, I have deleted my credit card information from my Amazon account, YesAsia account and PayPal account.
3. No more other fun but unnecessary stuff like video games, CDs, DVDs, jewellery etc.
4. No more Etsy purchases (unless as per point 5).
5. I will only buy bath stuff when I run out of a certain product. Which means - only when I have close to none toothpaste/shampoo/conditioner/what have you left will I buy a new one. And yes, I may buy these from Etsy, as the stuff they have is good stuff.
6. I will pack my lunch for uni instead of spending good money on not so good food, and for this purpose have ordered and received my own little lunchbox set! Hah. Won't that be cute..by which I mean slightly childish but fun.
7. I will give my credit card to my parents so that when I need - or think I need - to use it I will have to ask them for it. Boy, that should help.
8. I will get bank statements on how my account is doing every Friday - and I will actually look at it. ;)
9. I will buy craft stuff only when a) it's for a definite project, and just the amount I need and b) I know I will actually finish said project within the week. Better to use what I already have though, sure.

I guess that's the main stuff...it should work. :) All these are from October 1st 2006 until January 1st 2007. I guess Christmas will just be sooo great when I can wish for some books etc. Yay!

Something that doesn't fit into the 'saving money' stuff is that I will get back to what used to be my usual weight, which somehow went ballistic since March. The sports courses I signed up for (starting tomorrow! Me and my sister will be learning the coolness of Aikido - I hope - on Mondays from now on. Hah.) should help - although I signed up for them just because I wanted to, and not because of the weight thing.
Hey, at least I'm not joining Weight Watchers! ;)

In other news, I learned yesterday that one of my friends is going to get married next summer.
Now *that's* amazing...